


Never Sleeping, Ever Vigilant

by palavreado



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Implied Slash, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-24
Updated: 2011-10-24
Packaged: 2017-10-24 22:31:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/268606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/palavreado/pseuds/palavreado
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What a terrible bedside manner, Aziraphale.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Sleeping, Ever Vigilant

**Author's Note:**

> This proves that the closest I'll ever get to writing smut stops when both characters reach the bed.

Aziraphale found the demon in a small, cozy little building along the coast of Wales. Not that he was particularly looking for him; obviously, he’d just grown rather bored, and really missed having an excuse for drinking. The angel knocked on the door thrice. No answer. The lazy bastard was probably sleeping. He tried the door, and raised an eyebrow as he verified it was open.

Naturally, Crowley _was_ sleeping. Aziraphale bit his lip and made a ‘tsk’ sound. It would be a shame to wake him and disturb his slumber. Awfully impolite, too, but Aziraphale realized he didn’t really care. The angel plopped unceremoniously on the bedside and waved his legs around, waiting for the motion to wake Crowley up.

It didn’t.

Aziraphale frowned and did what, to him, seemed like the most logical course of action. He flipped the bedsheets, and the demon with them.

There was a “thud”ing sound, a yell, and a very satisfied and not very angelic smile.

“What the hell…”

“Hello, Crowley.”

“Oh. It’s you. Look, I have ears, you know? I’m not a snake. I have human ears and they can… they can hear things,” he said groggily.

“Hm?”

“Yeah… yeah, like… like sounds. Like, for example, the sound of you actually calling my name to wake me up.”

“Oh. Didn’t think of that.”

“Obviously not.”

“Um. Sorry? But you really have been sleeping far too long. What’s it been, ten years?”

“Sleeping is good.”

“I don’t see what could possibly be so good about it. In fact, I think it’s vaguely evil.”

“Exactly.”

“It’s not healthy.”

“Yup.”

“It’s… it’s wile-y.”

“Uhuh. You should try it.”

“What? Of course not! Didn’t you hear what I just said?”

“You mean, like the same thing you said a few centuries back about drinking?”

“That was, um. But who’s going to keep an eye on you while I’m asleep?”

“Well, you could sleep with me.”

The gravest and most uncomfortable silence took over the room as both angel and demon simply stared at each other.

“…pardon?”

“Whoa, okay, wait. I didn’t mean it like. I meant. Sleep. With me, as in. The same.”

“…the same?”

“No, not like the same as in the same bed or, or even… the same… room, I mean, if you want to, I guess, but no. I mean. Sleep with me, as in sleep at the same time as I sleep at the same… time.”

“What?”

“I… at the same time, like, you sleep when I sleep and we sleep together.”

“Crowley, reiterate the sentence, please.”

“Oh, god damn- bless- fuck it,” Aziraphale scowled, “we sleep at the same time. You find a place to sleep; I find a place to sleep. When I sleep, you sleep and we can both keep an eye on each other when we’re awake.”

Aziraphale stared at Crowley with the most unreadable expression that most certainly did not look like disappointment and pondered the demon’s proposition for a while, “…No.”

“No?”

“Absolutely not. I can’t sleep, I don’t need to sleep, I won’t sleep.”

Crowley sat next to Aziraphale on the bed and sighed, “Well, you know what they say… No rest for the wicked.”

Aziraphale elbowed him hard in the side.


End file.
